Text for Editing Practice, Part II (Music and Health essay)

Paragraph A (body paragraph):


In my opinion, I am agreement on music therapy is a good method for health. For instance, I have heard that doctor often advices people to hear some gentler music to keep gently. That makes a good environment to help people to ease anxiety, and helps sick cure quick.




Paragraph B (conclusion paragraph):


In conclusion, we can get different messages from the music. For instance, when we feel the stress of getting too much work to deal with, we can use the music to relax ourselves. On the other hand, we can also use music to keep our bodies to stay healthy. To me, music is a magic tool to help us managing our mind.




Paragraph C (conclusion paragraph):


Music has many powerful ways to effects our body and mind. It relaxes our body and prevents the harmful effects of chronic stress. Now, we can think about music therapy and other benefits of it without wondering, and believe that music is a good tool for health.

Text for Editing Practice, Part I (Body Art essay)

Paragraph A (body paragraph):


First, people commonly possess a desire to be different, and not only on a person level, but also with the way they create their own social group, adopting one or the other significant outer attribute as a sign of belonging. There are some other cases somewhat foreign for our environment when specific punctures of even scars are a must ritual for entering certain culture society. If piercing specialist is nervous or just not feeling well, then his or her negative energy will affect the patient in bad way. Moreover, the consequence could not only be external. Entire organism could be damage energetically.


Paragraph B (intro paragraph):


During the time, most people in the world like to do piercings on various parts of their bodies, but there are a high percentage of men, women, and college students. Because many people believe that tattoos can appear themselves very special in the street. Also, the most important thing is that different ethnicities of people have different opinion about tattoos in their bodies. I think piercings on various parts of their bodies are not ruthless, but it is concerning to appearance problems of people.


Paragraph C (body paragraph):

I think that piecing or tattoo on bodies do not make the difference from others. It just a sight, they want to change and show the world their way of being free and to see the things. I remember a friend who formed part of a band, he used to sing at parties and other places where a lot of young people gathered to hear him sang. However, he composed the lyrics of his songs but his songs related his way of thinking against violence, religion and politics. At Final, he always said “this is my life; I am free to do wherever I want” His attitude convince some young people piercing and tattoo like him because they said that they feel identified with him and the way to see the things.

BP #9 - Final Reflection on HeLa

    1. If you learned that tissue removed from your body during a routine procedure or examination at a doctor's office at some point in the past had gone on to significantly benefit science and research, would you feel that you should be retroactively compensated?

    Removing tissue from a part of my body during a routine procedure or examination at a doctor's office at some point in the past had gone on to significantly benefit science and research, I would feel that there are two ways i can react. First, if the cells just used to do expriment for developing medicial field, no matter it worked ot not, i will be happy. However,what if my cells were commercially used, then it helped doctors and scientists earn money, they should compensated me. Therefore, if i were Henrietta,whose cells were taken without asking, and also it became an important source of developing medical part till today, I should be compensated. 

    2. Which do you think is more important - your right to control your own tissue, or contributing to science and research for the greater good of humanity?

    Well,,, Choosing one of these two examples is really hard to me and anyone. In my opinion, contributing to science and research for the greater good of humanity is more important than my right to control my own tissue. Of course, using my tissue for doing experiment or developing medical field is the honore which is more than I deserve. However, it should be involved the one's consent.

"BP #8 - Going Green Again"

These are the three things that i can change in my life or my habits for "Go Greener."

1. reuse paper bags.
2. save water to save money.
3. produce or buy organic food.

In my home town, South Korea, "Going Green" has been big issue. I am sure they think about "Going Green" as much as Americans do or  even more than Americans do. In case of using plastic bag and paper bag, you should bring own your bag or pay 5 to 10 cents for per bag in markets or departments.


The one thing that i did not know about "Going Green," is there are many ways to save our environment, and these are not taking hard work, such as using a water filter pitcher, recycling, and turning off the electronic.

BP #7 - Financial Responsibility

    

According to the article Financial Responsibility for All : "A Myth or Reality?" by Lubie Grujicic-Alatriste. A lot of people have too many credit cards or try to make too much credit which can be damaged from embezzlement or financial scandals. The reason why, first, people shortage about knowledge and correct information about taking credit.. Second, it is easy to get a credit card for anyone. The last reason, institution have not been received the problem of credit card and credit which is not knowing enough. The solution of these problems is that people have to learn about credit and financial pitfalls and the government let the institutions to be taken responsibility. Also, President's plan is a good first step for improving the borrowing crisis. At least about credit and spending, we could try to be a bit more financially responsible.

    From this article, the increasing of using credit card for young people, the credit and a credit card misrepresenting of institutions are the credit perils and traps for the young people. As institutions -banks- have to give the young people enough information about taking credit card, the world borrowing crisis could be improved. For instance, my home country, Korea, issued college students about credit card. The college students was easy to get credit cards without specific information about credit card. The students had not mad up the debt which caused them to have bad credit. Therefore, institutions have to give them enough information about a credit card and the risk of using a credit card's advantage and disadvantage. Also, the people who want to get a credit card think about being able to use or not, and learn before use it.

BP #6 - Mini Essay on Informed Consent

    In providing by law that a mental patient must give informed consent to hospotalization but then failing to make provision for the patient's competence to be examined at admission, Florida perdictably violated the patient's rights. Florida's establiched procedure for involuntary placement needs to be applied "to all patients who cannot be admitted voluntarily, both those who are unwilling and those who are unable to give consent." ("A Brief History of Mental Health Law 'Reform'" Cornell Journal of Law and Public Policy, Fall 1992)(http://mentalillnesspolicy.org/legal/informed-consent-zinermon-burch.html)

   
 In Korea society based on the patriarchal system, authority is very important in the relation between patient and physician, and patient interaction, the explanation is not delivered well due to the perceived superior role of the physician by the patient, and patients perceives that the physicians are giving informed consent in odfer to allow themselves to be exempt from legal responsilility.("Perceptions of informed consent among patients and physicians in Korea"byLee, Won-Hee professor in Yonsei University.)(http://www.nursinglibrary.org/vhl/handle/10755/153158)

   Furthermore, in the past,  there was a different basic view of people of doctors and researchers. The limited experiments on the medical parts which the doctors and researchers exceed situation such as kidnapping colored people and doing experiments on them. Moreover, their excessive experiments was not the infraction of the medical laws.

BP#5 - Soda Tax

    Increasing tax on soda is essential. As the government raises excise on soda, the new policy effects on consumer's health issues.

    In the U.S, one of three children is an overweight. For instance, the children, each have can of glass of soda consumes per day, it increases them a chance of becoming obesity by 60%. Children obesity has more chance to get disease and sickness.

    In addition, drinking soda is not only linked on obesity, but also, it linked diabetics. Diet soda is safer for a diabetic to drink than sugary soft drinks, but avoiding soft drinks altogether may be the safest route to maintain or lessen your diabetic condition.

    Also, the low-calorie, low-carbohydrate may make the consumers for weight loss. For example, the American Dietetic Association states that substituting as artificial sweetener for sugar can save you 17 calories per teaspoon. This may be around 380 calories per day for a regular soda drinker or 1pound weight loss every nine to 10 days.

    The government increases on soda which reduces consuming soda prevents various diseases.